Do-It-Your-Suffer Project

I have made a bit of a reputation for myself for making or altering things to suit my 'tude. (That's "attitude" for anyone not in the know.) I've combined patterns to make clothes, taken clothes that weren't quite right to unpicked and re-sewed in order to shape them to my will, and generally make things just how I want them.
So I felt confident in my ability to make a custom backpack. It was just the right color, had see-through pockets so I COULD FIND THINGS, and plenty of outside pockets so I wouldn't have to dig for stuff. 
It took HOURS to make, but I was happy with the end result. It was perfect for me.
That is, until I took it on its maiden voyage.
Then, like the Titanic, it fell apart. 
When one strap broke in the airport, I just slung the remaining one over my shoulder, thinking of the best way to re-attach the errant strap. 

But when the SECOND strap broke, holding on by a single thread, I gave up on thoughts of any future salvage attempts. I didn't want to suffer through any more zipper sewing and piece fitting and thinking through what would fit where and what had to be sewn first, second, third...100th! So I carried the bag in my arms to my nephew, Curtis's, wedding, determined that it would be its final voyage.

When I mentioned to my family that I'd like to go out and find myself a piece of luggage that would get me home, my 6'4" brother, Greg, offered me his suitcase, as he had another, newer one. I thought his old one looked kind of big, but he assured me that he'd used it as carry on luggage more than once, and never got stopped from taking into the airplane cabin with him.

Apparently if you're 6'4", any piece of rolling luggage looks smaller by comparison to your towering body.

Half an inch shy of six feet got me STOPPED and told I had to check the bag. That meant going to carousel after the flight and waiting...and waiting...and waiting...and finally getting home at 4:00 am.

(I still appreciate my brother's effort to help me out. He even sent me a horrified little face emoji when I texted him about my predicament.)

I admit, I was jealous of my little sister sleeping on the back seat of the car as I made the 2 1/2 hour drive home. I remember sleeping in the back of the car as a kid, the comforting motion of the car creating soothing sleep, even though most of the time we 8 Anderson kids were sleeping on each other's shoulders.

We had so much togetherness, we didn't even need our own chairs!

(That's me in the middle, brother DellRay on my right, sister Rebecca on my left.)

Did you ever sleep in the car as a child?

Do you still sleep in the car?

Bad Axe!

I've heard of people naming their cars, but their FIRE ENGINES?

With all the fires in Utah and other parts of the country this summer, I have to be glad for all those people who are willing to fight those huge flames. 

It's not a job I would pick. I don't mind sitting around a campfire if the smoke's not blowing in my eyes, but that's about it.

What about you? Do you like fire?

Fun With Foam!

I never knew there was such a thing as a FOAM MACHINE before September 2018! What a great invention! It's kind of like a bubble blower, except that the bubbles are miniature and stick together and feel SO SOFT, delightfully slippery, and soapy, too.

My little sister (in the green skirt) could scarcely believe her eyes, but refused to run in and join me in spite of my invitation.

Even when my son Zack buried me in the stuff, I couldn't get enough. Once the machine quit jetting out the foam, I sat in the bubbles up to my chin until they slowly popped, not realizing that the soapy residue sinking into the ground created MUD!

Carolyn gave up on me, but no worries!

 My husband, Bob, hosed the mud off me before we left my granddaughter Rylee's birthday party.

There were far fewer adults in the heavenly foam soup than children, perhaps a ratio of 3 to 50.

What about you? Would YOU dive in?

Write Here in Ephraim 2018!

Guess what?! I'm headed to the 8th annual WRITE HERE IN EPHRAIM conference this weekend! (You can come, too! My son, Professor Andrew Robert Bahlmann, designed the logo. Good looking, right?) 

The conference is in, (no surprise!) Ephraim. (Not Mt. Ephraim, New Jersey. Turn around and head to Ephraim, Utah.)

Click here to check out the exciting schedule, where I'm presenting a class on brainstorming. (Fun stuff, Maynard!)

AND HERE ARE ALL THE PRESENTERS!

CLASS DESCRIPTIONS

(All the links are in Google Docs. Hope they open for you!)

Conference held in the Noyes Building, Snow College Campus

HERE'S THE SNOW COLLEGE CONFERENCE WEBSITE!

Do you like writing?

Dust Devils

Once upon a time, I was in Manti when a tornado blew through.

(I didn't see it, though.)

To make up for that lost experience, I see a bunch of dust devils when I drive Utah's highways and byways.)

There are lots of other names for dust devils, such as "sand pillars" or "dusters" or even "willy willy's." (What?!)

Have you ever seen these atmospheric whirlwinds where you live?

How about this: have you ever tried to get in the middle of a whirling column of air to see if it would pick you up and take you on an adventure?

(Well, the emergency room COULD be an adventure to some people...)

Unwanted Walking Companion

My sister Carolyn and I met someone on our walk last week.

Well, we met someTHING.

 The funny thing is, when dogs rush at us with barking throats and slathering tongues, Carolyn stands her ground, puts her hands on her hips, and tells them to leave.

When we ran across this little fellow small enough to step on (if you don't mind the crunch!) she nearly climbed up onto my shoulders. 

I sent a picture to Bob, and he said it was, indeed, a tarantula. (I have my shoe in the picture for size reference. Don't quibble if it doesn't look like a shoe to you. The only time I completely cover my foot is when I ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO, such as in 12 inches of snow or places that don't accept open footwear. Believe it or not, there are such places!)

Also keep in mind that my footwear is a glorious size 11, so that makes the tarantula even bigger than you first thought on seeing it.

Perhaps we should have used one of Carolyn's shoes... but I'm not sure she would have survived the trauma of having her footwear in such close proximity.

From what Bob told me, and what I read online, tarantulas rarely bite people. If they do, it may feel like a bee sting.

Worse than a bite, if threatened, tarantulas can scrape stinging hairs off their abdomens and flick them at intruders, which can cause a painful rash. (And a bald tarantula belly!)

Tarantulas may sometimes eat their own legs.

I prefer to keep my legs intact so I can keep on walking!

Do you like to go on walks?

Bird Attack! (Alfred Hitchcock was right!)

I was at the library minding my own business with my attention tuned to my laptop when I heard a tapping noise. I turned my head to see a feathery attacker just outside the window!

I don't know what this bird's issue was, but when it saw me staring at it, it glared back fearlessly.

When it turned its beak skyward, I wondered if it was summoning reinforcements. (How many birds would it take to break a window? I know it's possible, with their sharp beaks and pointy toenails. Put enough of those together with a flying leap behind them, and put up your laptop to deflect shattering glass!)

It was all a ruse. This feathered creature was such a force unto itself that I actually feared to step outside alone.

My fear may have stemmed from my older babysitting sister offering to let me, at 10 years old, to stay up late and watch a movie with her on television while the other children slept. (Or, as it turned out later for my two brothers, hide behind the couch to watch anyway.) The title of the movie?

The Birds!

 Did you ever watch Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds?" 

(If not, you can click the title and watch it online... if you dare! I kept covering my eyes with a blanket, so maybe I should give it a grown-up try.)