Trench Coat and Soccer Sock

I didn't want to go to the store, but I had the debit card. So I was the designated payer. Disguising my disarray under a trench coat and a thick soccer sock tied around my rumpled hair (masquerading as a head band) apparently did not do the trick.
"Mom!" whispered my teenager as we wandered down the store aisle. "You look like a hobo vagrant!"
"Really?" I asked, patting my soccer sock. "Should I have tied the knot under my hair instead of on top?"
He rolled his eyes and moved four steps away from me, pretending he wasn't with me. He even offered to drive home, taking the key and leaving the store to get the car while I was at the checkout counter.
Wasn't that nice of him? And do you think he'll hurry me to the store again before I'm ready?